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it says in Song of Songs : "Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires."

"He (the Pastor) interpreted this to mean that no one, man or woman, should be agitated about the choice of a mate, but should be 'asleep' as it were, in the will of God, until it should please Him to 'awake' him."

-Passion & Purity, Elisabeth Elliot -

It's all very well if you're happily single and free as a lark, this will come across as good advice.

If you're unhappily single and stressing about getting old and omgwhatifi'msingleforlife?! - this will come across as even better advice. Take it to heart!

Or you may fall under this category of "Too late! I think I'm in love.." Uh-oh. How now brown cow?

Yeah, sure, easy to say "Just don't think of him/her!" In reality though, a line from the song 'Kill' by Jimmy Eat World comes to mind:

"I can't help it baby, this is who I am

I am sorry but I can't just go turn off how I feel.."

It's hard (but not impossible), especially when there is absolutely no reason for you to hold a grudge, no reason for you to cut all communication lines, no reason for you to give each other the silent treatment..it's especially hard when you're already such good friends.

But what if it was never God's will for you to be with him/her in the first place?

Then surely He wouldn't have allowed me to feel this way about him/her for so long, right?

I don't claim to be an expert in BGRs and love, and I don't know how to answer that last question. I have heard people say, "I have a feeling it's God's will, it just feels..right, y'know? And I've felt this way for so long already, it must mean something..."

All I know and can say is that He must have a reason behind it. Also, I don't think it's wrong to love (In fact, Jesus said, "As I have loved you, so you must love one another."), but it has dawned on me that it is what I do with those feelings that matter.

I could let it get the better of me, so that when things don't quite go the way I want them to, I stress and get agitated and worry about what the future holds for me...and then slowly evolve into a bitter Miss Crankypants and end up hating him, myself and God...

Or I could love him anyway, but take that love to God and leave it in His hands. To love, but to commit all heartfelt desires to God and let Him do what He wants with that love. Keep it there, take it away, dissolve it, increase it, whatever.

I have chosen the latter - to love by faith.

So there you have it. One of the 1st lessons i've drawn from reading Passion & Purity. Agree? Disagree? All thoughts welcome. :)